Well shit.

I wrote this letter during 3rd period before I saw the comments on those posts. I apologize if this makes things more complicated. I feel like I understand the situation better now kind of but I'd still like you to see this letter...

"You don't give up on people you love. But I guess that's what both of us did.
Though I still maintain a sense of insecurity, that sense used to be substantially larger than it is now. I used to surround myself with people, with anyone because I thought that if I had people around me, it meant I was "accepted". I was confirming my worth in a synthetic way. And to keep those people, I allowed them to step all over me. Many people I know now are not aware of what I was, how I carried myself. We all go through phases in life, not that they are the same. But that each of us are so many different kinds of people within our own one life.
I've been feeling comfortable in my own skin and not so ashamed of myself. So when someone says that all I did was make them feel miserable, that my complete selfishness was so apparent and prevalent, that I was just a drain. It made me doubt everything about myself. I quit my job, I almost cut my hair off to try to make a change until I finally realized that no impulse of change controlled by me was going to help the situation. Doing that wasn't really going to change me.
So tell me what I did... You say that all I did was take, take, take because you werent willing to take. But How? There are all these claims and I believe them; you're a smart person and you possess a big heart. So for you to say all those things, it must mean something true, something valid. How did I put you down. Tell me so I can change for the better, so I don't screw anyone else over. Tell me so I feel like I can be close to someone without hurting them.
It also hit me really fucking hard that you said you talked to Manny. All you did was talk shit about him (similarly to Aaron). And going to someone you didn't seem to respect was very indicative of your lack of respect for me. Even teachers, people I really look up to.
I understand that you want nothing to do with me. I know you and Ely care about eachother very much. To me, you seem to create a balance, a compatability. I'll stay away from you two if both of you think that would be right. I don't want to, but then again you made it seem that not only was I affecting you negatively, but your relationships with others as well. Ely is a beautiful person and I feel grateful to know her and know that there are people out there like her.
Let me know."

I hope that you see how much I respect you Yerika, and that this letter is a testament to that. I would have made this more direct or made it a comment but it was too long.
After reading all those comments and postings again, I feel like only posting the letter would make things more of a mess. I don't expect you to respond to it, I just wanted you to see how I feel. How willing I am to be better and how sorry I am that just being myself was such detrimental force to you.